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Ripped!


Black Venus

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Sorry to read this has happened to you.  The absolute bloody cheek of invading your own garden, that is like a step too far in my book.  I hope you can hang on to what you have left and that you can mature those lower branches to help fill some jars.

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https://youtu.be/aS4w0Y1Kif4

 

all seriousness, i know you probably dont want to hear this but the wolves will come back so you need to wrap up and shut up shop. It was good while it lasted but you'll become the local urban myth/legend who provided two young reprobates with the story of their lifetime. Make it all disappear and never mind trying to finish any of it, heartbreaking i can only imagine but its what someone looking through the window would say and not some who would sympathise with you in whatever way shape or form. 

Edited by rumplestilskin'n
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Well, I'm not going to give up my primary hobby after all these years just because of some thieving wankers.

 

But I'm also not going to be knocking anybody's brains out with a cudgel. I'm a polite (usually) middle-aged woman and it's not really my thing. lol

 

I'm going to work on the basis that they're opportunists rather than criminal masterminds, and will try to scare the shite out of them if/when they come back.

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6 hours ago, Saddam said:

They'll be back.

Get a sheet of marine ply, cut it into 2ft strips, drill a load of self-tapping 6" wood screws through it and place the strips pointy side up along the fence edge then cover them with sheets of newspaper and some leaves. 

 

Use this arrangement for the screws, with 1" between each screw and 1" between each row;

.  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  

  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  

.  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  

Offset them so each row alternates giving you the best screw per foot coverage. :D 

Ripper fishing. 

and put poo on the pointy bits

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1 hour ago, Newcouch said:

and put poo on the pointy bits

 

Haha. As it happens one of my cats is very old and incontinent, so they may already have stepped in some of his dumps.

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It's great to see you back here @SubSpecies – your diary last year was such an inspiration to me. Thank you for your really good suggestion about fishing line and hooking it up to noisy stuff. In terms of quick and easy things I can do immediately, it's perfect. I've attached a carrier bag full of empty cat food tins to a tripwire just inside the gate, and a couple of others full of glass bottles. So if any thieving twat tries to climb over the gate they'll get a noisy welcome. It's such a violation to have somebody come into my garden like this, but on the plus side, being this close to the house (and neighbouring houses) should mean that anything which makes a lot of noise will freak them out.

 

I've also rigged up a load of nylon twine around the garden for any intruders to get their feet caught up in. All just above cat height, so the felines can pass underneath. I'll probably end up getting caught in it myself, but desperate times call for desperate measures.

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So sorry to hear of your loss :(      Thieving fuckers need their hand chopping off !!    

 

With all due respect ... if they want them .. they will prob get them !    

 

Screw / clamp the pots to the floor to stop them taking the entire plant without making noise ,   cat bells tied to certain parts that way it will jingle if manhandled ... also wont alert neighbours.

 

Fishing line around the perimeter connected to something you will hear .. wind bells, chimes  :yep:     Even one of the  cheap personal rape alarms  .... fishing line will pull the pin out and brings the noise :)     

 

A 12 gauge , a comfy chair and a -20 sleeping bag ... camp in the garden lol       Sorry i had too.    

 

I wish you all the best and hopefully you dont get any more dramas.    

 

 

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On 19/09/2022 at 7:43 PM, rumplestilskin'n said:

give em a good hard stare

 

https://youtu.be/-0xhkLJDMnM

 

He could have stared the queen out!

 

Anyone taken LSD before? (Disclaimer: Don't take LSD - again!)

 

Edited by Lux_Interior
Long live the Charly thing.
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gutted for you mate.

It's worse being your own garden , must feel like being burgled !

 

Lets hope its kids who get laughed at when they try to sell it and it puts them off coming back.

either way , lets hope they dont come back. 

 

can you rig up some lines above your fence perimiter with jinggly things on, or maybe rig the greenhouse door to the electric lol

 

Best of luck with things .

 

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Thanks very much for all your supportive comments and suggestions. I appreciate them all, even the violent ones. lol

 

2 hours ago, CheechChongReturns said:

Lets hope its kids who get laughed at when they try to sell it and it puts them off coming back.

either way , lets hope they dont come back. 

 

Yes, that had crossed my mind as well. Who would steal the tops off plants barely three weeks into flower, with white pistils and no resin? A gormless fuckwit, that's who.

Maybe idiot kids, and when they got home their mummies gave them a smacked bottom and made them go and tidy their rooms.

Surely if they were serious thieves they wouldn't do this, they would bide their time until there was some actual bud on there. Or am I missing something?

 

A case in point: when they did the greenhouse they nicked the top off one of my tomato plants. Yes really, they carefully cut the top three branches off it and took it away, thinking it was weed. Good luck with smoking that, you turd-brained tossers. :smokin:

 

Anyway, if they decide to have another go they'll have some fun with a dozen or so booby-traps. We've got frying pans, cat food tins, glass bottles, plumbing pipes, metal patio chairs, some rude signs (if they can read) and a whole network of shin-height fishing line around the actual plants. I've even got a tripwire set up on the approach to the gate which will pull all the recycling boxes over if anyone walks through it. Let's hope they fall flat on their faces and land in some cat shit.

 

If they're really lucky and I can get to the landing window in time, they might even get a polite middle-aged lady screaming at them that she's going to rip their bollocks off with her teeth.

 

Thank you everyone for helping to cheer me up. This really is a lovely community on this site and your kindness means a lot to me.

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Sorry to hear this mate.

 

Second @OldFord a bit of trip wire works wonders, plus any animals are likely smart/slick enough to avoid them. Bells on the plant is genius though, hats off

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1 minute ago, blerie420 said:

Sorry to hear this mate.

 

Second @OldFord a bit of trip wire works wonders, plus any animals are likely smart/slick enough to avoid them. Bells on the plant is genius though, hats off

 

Yes it is genius, a bloody good idea. I will follow that one up.

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