WHO IS JACK SCHITT

[Guest 123456]

WHO IS JACK SCHITT

For some time many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt? We find ourselves at a loss when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt!"

Well, thanks to my genealogy efforts, you can now respond in an intellectual way. Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc. They had one son,  Jack.

In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The deeply religious couple produced six children:

Holie Schitt, GivaSchitt,  Fulla Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt. Against her  parents' objections, Deap Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout  After being married 15 years,Jack and Noe Schitt divorced.

Noe Schitt later  married Ted Sherlock, and, because her  kids were living with them, she  wanted to  keep her previous name. She was then known as Noe Schitt Sherlock. Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they produced a son with a rather nervous disposition named Chicken Schitt. Two of the other six children, Fulla  Schitt  and Giva Schitt, were inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the  Happens brothers in a dual ceremony.

The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens nuptials.The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Hoarse. Bull Schitt, the  prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.  Now when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt," you can correct them.

Sincerely, Crock O. Schitt

NOTE: PLEASE PASS THIS ON TO ANYONE WHO NEEDS TO LOWER THEIR BLOOD PRESSURE.